The Bald and Beautiful
by meganislost
Summary: What happens when Miley is having friendship troubles with Oliver and she goes to a fortuneteller for advice? My first FanFic, parody. I hope you like it. R&R please! Disclaimer: I do not own Hannah Montana!   :MGN


Miley had all the luck in the world. She was pretty, had best friends, and was a millionaire pop star. **Until freshman year. **

"Hey Miley!" Oliver said excited to see her. "I can't believe you are bringing me and Lily to Paris Hilton's party. It's going to be the best party of the year. I can just see it. Bright lights, great singers, delicious food."

"Enough Oliver!" Miley cut him off. "I don't even know if I'm going to that party. There's another party and it's going to have a fortuneteller. You know how I love fortunetellers!"

"A _fortuneteller_? What about the food?"

"I'm sure the food will be great too, I mean... it _is _Britney Spears' party."

"Sounds great. I want you to know… I LOVE YOU for this!"

Miley laughed in a disgusted way. "Umm, okay."

"What's all the ruckus guys?" Lily asked as she walked up from Rico's Surf Shop.

"Oh, nothing. We are just thinking about which party we should go to." Miley held out her hands, "Paris or Britney? Oh, and I was also telling Oliver about how Britney's party is going to have a fortuneteller."

"Oh my goodness, a fortuneteller? I have never been to a party with a fortuneteller! Well then again, I haven't really been to any big parties." Lily added.

"Britney's party it is!" Miley decided.

"Whoop whoop." Oliver added for attention.

"Oliver, no one cares about you so shut up!" Lily and Miley said in unison.

"You guys say that a lot, you know." Oliver got really depressed.

Oliver then walked to Rico's Surf Shop and got a paper bag; he cut two eyeholes and a mouth hole and stuck it over his head, he was so embarrassed.

And that's how he went to the party the next day.

-

Miley was so excited to go to the party. She bought a whole new outfit for it. It was pretty dang fashionable if she did say so herself. Even Lily agreed! Now that was surprising!

But then soon Lily and Miley were pissed!

Oliver had come to the party with a brown paper bag that you use for crappy school lunches over his head!

Miley was so furious she practically ran over to the fortuneteller, while Lily attempted to stuff food in Oliver's small paperbag mouth hole.

"Will Oliver ever be normal again?" Miley asked the fortuneteller.

The fortuneteller replied in a mysterious tone, "He will never be normal again unless you shave off all of your hair like Britney did."

Miley left the party shaken up and not exactly sure about what she should do. If she didn't shave her head for Oliver, he would never be the same again. And her hair would always grow back over time, right?

-

The next few days, Miley contemplated whether looks or friendship was more important. She talked it over with Lily a lot. And they came to this conclusion: On the plus side of being bald, Hannah's wig would fit more snugly on her head during her shows!

So that was it. Miley Stewart was going to shave her beautiful brunette hair for her good friend Oliver.

To Miley this was really hard. But just think about it, to any girl this would be hard. Possibly even for any guy. She just couldn't do it. Well, not by herself.

Surprisingly to everyone, she got Jackson to shave her head one lock at a time. I mean, at least he had experience with the bald and beautiful as he would say, right?

-

It was done. Her _precious_ hair. Gone.

"Jackson, I can feel the wind on my head! This is almost like a new beginning."

"Keep on smiling Miles, keep on smiling."

"Jackson… it's for Oliver. I know I've been kind of snappy lately towards him." Miley sighed, "Well I guess after I think about it, I've been snappy towards everyone."

"Ya think?" Jackson replied annoyed, "You know what Miley, don't talk to me right now because I don't care about your feelings. Gosh, girls. I just don't get 'em. Blah blah this, and blah blah that! Just shut up!"

-

The next Monday as Miley was walking to first period, Dandruff Danny opened the door to the science lab and smacked her square in the face.

Miley got up and started running to the nurse with pain as she tripped and stumbled down the steep staircase. When she got to the bottom she stood up in front of her biggest crush with a big bloody nose and two missing front teeth.

She started singing "All I want for Christmas is my two front teeth." And slid around the corner to the nurses office.

Embarrassed as she was, her shiny baldness didn't even matter at this point in time, and it probably won't at this rate.

Miley was surprised to see Oliver in the nurse's office. He still had that silly paper bag over his head.

"WHAT HAPPENED TO YOUR HAIR!?" Oliver retorted.

"I shaved it for you," Miley answered. "That's what you wanted, the fortune teller at Brit's party told me."

"MILEY!!! What were you thinking? How would that old hag know what I wanted?"

"You mean… you never wanted me to shave my head?" Miley was freaking out at this point.

Oliver slipped the paper bag off his head and held it towards Miley. "I think you need this more than I do."


End file.
